Thursday, September 15, 2011

Apa yang penting? (bukan kerjasama)

Salam,

Perkara nak diupdate bersusun juga, tapi masa memang tak ada. Satu aje dalam kepala saya skrg ini,


SAYA NAK GRADUATE ON TIME (AUG 2012)
(Sekarang tengah sibuk analyze data, writing (one chap complete, two manuscripts tgh struggle dengan results and discussions), graphing dengan R, baca journals. Sekian)

Friday, August 12, 2011

Ramadhan's blessing

Salam,

I do not know the best way to express this. One thing that I always believe is, Allah always answers our prayers.

Today, I had spent 4 hours with my new committee member, Dr. R. Right after coming out of his office, I burst into tears and cried for an hour. To recall for some bitter memories, around this time of the year, I cried so many times because of my stumbled research works, the lazy summer workers, bla bla bla. Ironically, today, I cried of joy.

Ok, kena tulis bahasa, In case, who knows? Kot2 prof. tu nanti jumpa pulak blog nie, cnp ke Google Translator. Before graduate nie, kena amek semua precautions.

Sebelum saya jumpa Dr. R, saya dah meeting dengan penyelia utama saya tu. Jawapan standard selepas saya present data itu ini, graphs yg bermuka2 surat itu, dah berbuih mulut bgtau saya punya layout dissertation writing, ialah OK, saye setuju. Itu sahaja, ok? Kecewa? Saya dah biasa dengan jawapan OK itu.

Bila saya jumpa Dr. R hari ini, saya angkut folder yang sama saya bawa tunjuk prof. OK itu. Dr. R godak satu-satu file saya, bukan hanya yang dalam folder, tapi dalam hard disk juga. Perkara pertama dia point out pada saya, labeling untuk ANOVA table saya salah. Owh gembiranya saya, sebab buat pertama kalinya ada orang bgtau saya saya buat salah!!!  Dr. R soh bukak program yang saya run analysis tu, cek semua command, suggest guna command lain, siap bagi contoh, dan bgtau yang method baru lebih accurate.

Lepas tu, saya tunjuk graphs lain pulak. Dia soh saya bukak semua Excel file yang saya simpan data untuk graphs tu, dah tu satu-satu dia check. Siap tunjukkan cara paling senang untuk process data, yang selama ini saya buat secara manual. Dia pon ajar saya untuk guna macro dalam Excel (silalah ketawakan saya, saya tak pandai guna macro), dan dia siap suruh saya practice depan dia, to make sure saya grab concept macro tu.

Tung tang tung tang, takut data tak elok, dia siap suggest yang saya setup satu experiment baru - dalam green house - (sebab summer depan dah patut grad kan). Dia bayar semua, tak perlu sakit kepala mana nak korek funds. Dia cuma tanya commitment saya untuk collect data, and for sure, bukan masalah bagi saya (walaupun lepas tu siap tanya, sempat ke saya nak grad nie, hahahaha).

Tung tang tung tang, saya tanya dia, boleh tak dia jadi co-advisor saya (ini telah difikirkan sejak dia report duty this April), sebab saya tersangatlah under-advised. Dr. R kata, dia tanak complicatedkan things and papers kat Grad School, so dia willing buat kerja as major advisor dengan title minor advisor. Saya dengan selambanya bagitau dia yang saya under-advised, saya rasa saya tertinggal dan lembap (ke lembab?), semua benda saya figure out sendiri, process and analyze data blindly (sebab major advisor asek kata OK saje, maka saya pon buat apa yang saya suka. Sadis kan?) bla bla bla, and dia boleh cakap, dengan data yang saya tunjuk pada dia hari ni, dia kata dia bangga dengan saya, and wish that he has one like me. Terharu ok, sebab selama ini saya bekerja keras, bertungkus lumus, dan diunder-appreciated. Owh dia pon cakap, written English saya untuk chapter yang saya bagi dia comparable dengan journal yang dia selalu reviews (senyum kejap, perasan pon perasan lah, kan?)

Bla bla bla lagi, Dr. R kata, kalau saya kena extend, dia willing untuk sponsor saya. Walaupun saya rasa saya akan terima sponsor tu (memandangkan kelembapan saya), saya tetap cakap, saya akan cuba dulu untuk graduate summer. Dr. R pon willing nak tolong saya tulis manuscript, dan harapnya pengalaman dia as reviewer akan bantu saya.

Keluar dari bilik dia selepas 4 jam, saya terus menangis tersedu-sedu. Semenjak saya start research study saya dari tahun lepas, hari-hari saya berdoa pada Allah agar research saya dipermudahkan. Selepas setahun saya struggled, melalak, berguling terlentang, dan sengsara (semua lah yang seangkatan dengannya) Alhamdulillah, segala pujian bagi-Nya, di bulan ramadhan, hari jumaat, doa itu terjawab!!!!

Semoga dipermudahkan semuanya selepas ini!!!

Friday, August 5, 2011

Kisah ayam dan ikan di bulan puasa

Salam,

Pukul 4.00 pm, kedai halal 1. Stock daging halal dah habis, jumaat minggu depan baru restock.

Pukul 4.10 pm. Kedai Asian. Stock ikan sotong dan seangkatan dengannya, juga dah abis. Tokey p bercuti. Jumaat depan baru ada stock baru. Owh sudah, takkan seminggu nak berbuka sardin n telur?

Pukul 4.30 pm. Kedai halal 2 (Lubbock hanya ada 2 kedai halal). Ada lamb saje. Waktu nak keluar kedai, Tokey tanya, nak stock ayam dia masak katering ke tak. Beratnya 13 pound. Otak sudah letih, kul 7 am dah berkebun, saya angguk2 saje kepala. Balik rumah, malam2 time orang nak tido, dok bersihkan ayam satu sinki macam esok nak raya. Rega boleh tahan, dalam $20 satu bembat tu.

Tak lama lepas tu, adik undergrad kaki Joran GP yang baik hati, tepon nak anto ikan. Ayam x abes siang lagi, ikan ketik2 masih hidup (masih hidup lagi waktu entry nie ditulis. Sape nak siang ikan besar tu?)

Rezeki Ramadhan. Ya Allah, permudahkanlah ramadhan ku).
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Wednesday, July 27, 2011

update?

Venue: research farm
Time: 10.55 am
Task: waiting for research assistant to come, making reflectance measurement.

Note: this blog will be on hiatus until further notice hehe

Happy ramadhan to all!!!! ( ya Allah do not let this ramadhan be my last)
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Sunday, July 10, 2011

Saya malu

Salam,

Walau apa pun alasannya, saya tetap malu. Petikan berita ini saya copy paste dari Lubbock avalanche journal, local paper Lubbock yang jarang sekali kisah pasal negara lain. Tahniah Malaysia!!!!

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia —At least 20,000 Malaysians defied government warnings by marching for electoral reforms Saturday, as police fired tear gas and detained more than 1,600 in the country’s biggest political rally in four years. The crackdown on the opposition-backed demonstration in Malaysia’s main city, Kuala Lumpur, triggered criticism that Prime Minister Najib Razak’s long-ruling coalition was unwilling to allow public dissent or make election laws fairer ahead of national polls widely expected by mid-2012. Najib’s administration declared the rally illegal and warned people repeatedly over the past month to avoid it. Officials insisted it was simply an opposition scheme to spark chaos and stir anti-government sentiment, while activists accused authorities of being afraid of a protest that could undermine their authority. Authorities blocked roads, shut rail stations and deployed trucks with water cannons near the Independence Stadium in downtown Kuala Lumpur where activists sought to gather. More than 200 activists had been arrested over the past two weeks for promoting the rally. The large number of demonstrators who showed up despite the threat of arrests and the disruptions in transport links bolstered claims by activists that the government had misjudged public opinion by not allowing what they insisted would have been a peaceful rally. The crackdown “stirred a sense of outrage against the exhibition of raw power by our government,” said Ambiga Sreenavasan, head of the Bersih coalition of civic groups that organized the rally. “What is the necessity for a show of might against right? No matter what, right will always prevail,” she said. Police said in a statement they detained 1,667 people Saturday in a clampdown called “Operation Erase Bersih.” Those arrested included several senior opposition officials. Some were released after several hours, with police indicating that most would not be held overnight. Thousands tried to reach the stadium from various parts of Kuala Lumpur, chanting “Long live the people” and carrying yellow balloons and flowers as they marched. Police fired numerous rounds of tear gas and chemical-laced water in repeated attempts to disperse the crowds, causing demonstrators to scatter into nearby buildings and alleys before they regrouped. Police helicopters flew overhead as a brief downpour failed to deter the protesters. Witnesses said riot police armed with batons charged at some protesters and dragged them into trucks. Some were seen bleeding, but police could not confirm any injuries. Anwar Ibrahim, Malaysia’s top opposition figure, was being treated at a hospital for a “minor injury” he said he received when his group was hit by tear gas. The Malaysiakini news website said he had a knee injury. “We were attacked from both corners but what was horrifying is that the police shot directly at the protesters, some of them clearly aimed at me personally, so my security assistants had to cover me and one was badly injured because the canister was shot direct; he is badly injured,” Anwar told Associated Press Television News. “This is a simple portrayal of the extent of desperation of brutal action approved by the Prime Minister Najib.” The demonstrators dispersed after a five-hour standoff with police. Only several hundred reached the stadium. Najib insisted Saturday the protesters only represent a minority, and that most Malaysians support his administration. “If there are people who want to hold the illegal rally, there are even more who are against their plan,” the prime minister was quoted as saying by the national news agency, Bernama. Organizers said 50,000 took part in the rally, but police claimed there were only up to 6,000. Other observers and participants said the total was between 20,000 and 30,000. They noted that it was highly unlikely that police could have arrested a quarter of the demonstrators. An accurate count was impossible because they were scattered in various areas. The rally has galvanized the opposition and has been credited for a surge in political awareness among the public in recent weeks. Opposition leaders accuse Najib’s National Front coalition of relying on fraud to preserve its 54-year grip on power, which has been eroded in recent years amid mounting complaints about corruption and racial discrimination. The government insists the current electoral policies are evenhanded. The activists’ demands include an overhaul of voter registration lists, tougher measures to curb fraud and fairer opportunities for opposition politicians to campaign in government-linked media. The National Front’s mandate expires in mid-2013 but many analysts expect elections to be called by next year. Supporters of the Bersih coalition were also planning solidarity marches over the weekend in foreign cities, including in Australia, Britain, France, Hong Kong, Indonesia, Japan, the Philippines, South Korea, Thailand and the United States. In Washington, State Department spokeswoman Victoria Nuland said the U.S. has been communicating to Malaysia the importance of respecting human rights, including freedom of expression and assembly. “We consider it incumbent on all sides to refrain from violence,” she told a news conference Friday. ___ Associated Press writer Matthew Pennington in Washington contributed to this report.
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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

It is officially begins

Salam,

My first day of fieldwork officially began yesterday. Out of 24 measurements, I only managed to do 8. It was so hot outside, 42 celcius. Since the time frame that is allowed for me to do the measurements is around 11am to 1pm, and 3pm to 4pm (hottest time of the day!!), I began at 12pm (after helping my advisor's another student to assemble her weather station) and decided to stop at 3pm considering the heat that almost burned my head. 

When I got home, I immediately took a shower while I should have wait my body temperature to decrease. As a consequence, I could feel the burning in my head, especially that I showered my head first, (macam api menyala-nyala disiram air) and got headache afterwards! First day is always tiring, not only that I worn out, but I slept from 4.30pm to 6.30pm, and fell asleep before 12 am last night. Owh, and I drank at least 2 liter of water when I was out at the field (none was removed, so just imagine the hotness).

Starting from yesterday onwards, until the first or second week of September, I will spend at least 2 weeks/month collecting data for my research. My goal this year is to process and analyze my data when not taking any measurements, yet based upon my experience last year, it is not an easy thing to do. It took me a day or two to recover myself from the fieldwork, and by that time, I had to start the new cycle of measurement again. But, if I really want to graduate by next August, I just have to push myself :(

Well, last but not least, I started my fieldwork at 56.8kg. Last year, my weight went to 49.8kg by September. I really have to lose at least 5kg, considering that my flabby stomach starts to build up. * Fingers crossed*

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The worst nightmare

Salam,

I am worried sick.

 Normal / healthy looking cotton plants.

 Stunted plants in my experimental plots caused by extreme drought. Some of the seeds has failed to emerge, despite plenty of irrigation has been applied. Last rain in Lubbock was in October. (Now I totally understand why rain is such a bless!)

In spite of the state of art in technologies that we are proud (arrogant) of, we are so powerless when it comes to the mother nature that He, the Glorious Almighty, has created.

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Saturday, June 18, 2011

Promo filem

Salam,

Dah 2 hari otak saya jammed, baca buku pon tak masuk, nak buat modeling pon dah kering idea. Konon-kononnya utk melegakan otak, saya paksa Imran bawak saya tengok wayang X Men : First Class. Kami pon p lah drive-in movie, bayar $6 dapat tengok 2 sekaligus. Oleh sebab tanak membazir (satu lagi sebab kenapa saya ended up tengok movies banyak sgt), cerita X Men tu start pukul 12 am, terpaksa la tengok cerita Green Lantern yang agak sengal-sengal itu (sila lah jangan tengok cerita one man show macam Rambo nie, bosan gila). 

Gambar ikhsan pakcik Google




Siapa yang pernah tengok sequel X Men sebelum nie, saya rasa First Class nie lah yang terbaik so far. Owh rasa tak boleh tido malam tengok Charles Xavier and Magneto muda-muda (Kalau pernah tengok cerita Narnia, actor Prof X nie ialah Mr Tumnus yang berkaki kuda tu). Prequel nie elaboratekan;

1. Macamana Erik (Magneto) jadi luar biasa jahat
2. Siapa yang jaga Raven (Mystique) dari kecil n macamana dia ended up jadi geng Magneto
3. Sape yang cipta cerebro and super sonic airplane tu
4. Saya suspect Alex tu ialah Scott muda-muda, hmm
5. Macamana Prof X boleh paralyzed (kenapa perlu dia paralyzed jaman muda-muda huhu)

Kesimpulannya, X Men memang lagi best dari Pirate of Carribean: On Stranger Tides. Johnny Depp macam dah hilang touch, tak gile-giler sangat pon, nak harap mermaid cantek Syrena tu aje. Agaknya bila dah banyak sequel pelakon yang sama, boring makcik menontonnya. Ada sesiapa dah tengok Kungfu Panda 2? (Imran cepat-cepat geleng tak mahu tengok kartun!!!)


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Waktu kritikal

Salam,

Waktu paling kritikal utk stay awake ialah pukul 3 pm, selepas lunch spicy catfish and shrimp tomyum, pulak tu kena buat heavy reading dekat library yang suhunya sangat melalaikan. *fingers crossed*
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Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Golden Gate, San Fran.

Salam,

Saya tade mood nak menulis. Budak Serbia yang perangainya memang macam Serbia tu, kerja duk mengutuk-ngutuk orang kat lab (Dia sebut pasal orang Korea la Asian la apa-apa aje la). Saya malas nak dengar, nanti saya sakit hati. Saya plan nak berambus dari lab sekejap lagi, cari tempat lain untuk baca buku. Silalah tengok gambar saje (Gambar tak banyak).




(Tetiba rasa nak selit gambar sendiri)

Monday, June 13, 2011

How many hours a grad student should work in a day?

Salam,

Personally, I don't think a grad student should sleep and eat and live in his/her lab or graduate lab. Shouldn't we allocate at least couple of hours (per day or per week?) for ourselves, as pursuing a PhD life can be challenging enough to maintain our sanity. I wonder how many hours per day my colleagues spend on research or studying related works. Well, those do not include FB-ing or blogging (started to feel guilty myself, as I spent some times (usually less than an hour) reading gossips and ridiculous political shenanigans from home country, but again, I need to keep my wisdom, I have a husband to be entertained at home. I am not into blog hopping, tweeter or FB that much, but unfortunately I am addicted to TV series – Glee, Good Housewife, The Simpsons).

The most hours I can work is 10 (plus an hour of lunch, prays, blogging etc) and the least is none at all (Well, this only happens on Sunday, bear in mind, I have a husband (Kelab Isteri Taat says I to have to keep entertain him). I only have two schedules, which are,

1. Go to campus around 10 am, work until 2 pm, go home for cooking, lunch, pray etc. Go back to campus right after the lunch break and continue to work from 3pm to 8 pm.

2. Everything is the same as the previous, but with an exception, which is after the lunch hour. Instead of going back to school, I take a nap sleep until I hardly sleep anymore (this can take up to 2-3 hours). Work some more during nights, but with Imran watches TV, I can concentrate for only an hour or two (the TV is next to my study table!). Fortunately, this one happens less, less frequently than the previous one.

When I started the program about 3 years ago, my motivation was to the fullest that I could stay at campus and studied for 12 hours. I could study without any distraction for straight 6 hours (no food or break). Plus, I shared my apartment during that time that it wasn’t a great, comfortable place to study. When Imran joined me a year later, the studying hours perhaps reduced at least to half. It took me a semester to recover, considering that I took 12-13 credit hours for two semesters (average is 9) and my brain was totally desperate for a break. Sometimes I wonder, where did I gain the motivation to study like a freak during that time, because now, there is urgency for me to be in that non-sanity state again. I feel that I should work more and more and more, but how many hours I should really spend?

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Productivity

Salam,

The easiest way to measure daily productivity:

Jot down the works that you plan to finish in a day, by the end of that day, tick the works that you have successfully executed.

Plan for works that are managable within a day, don't be too ambitious to jot down all the research works that you should do in a year. It can end up with a negative productivity and watching the Glee ^_^
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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Hearst Castle, CA

Salam,

Saya memang bercita-cita tak nak add captions kat gambar-gambar nie. Alasan kukuh saya: kena study modeler language, betulkan literature review and compare model component calculations hehehe. Siapa yang rajin nak tahu pasal Hearst Castle nie, sila klik http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hearst_Castle
 
Sikit saje yang saya nak inform, tuan punya castle nie bercita-cita untuk build something little selepas duduk dalam khemah bertahun-tahun. Something little?
 




































Owh kaler gold kat dinding yang anda nampak tu, tiles tu sebenarnya disalut dengan gold hehehe. Masih something little?

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Kisah statistik

Salam,

Sape suka statistic sila angkat tangannnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!! (Saya angkat tangan tinggi-tinggi). Semenjak study agronomy nie, sekejap-sekejap statistic, sekejap-sekejap statistic, sampai tahap nak sorok tangan bawah meja huhu.

Bila time kena start test model, saya dah pening kepala. Model tu ialah linear regression line, so ada slope n intercept. SV kata, buat t-test asing-asing, mula-mula test slope dulu lepas tu kalau takde significant different, baru test intercept. Kalau intercept pon tak berbeza statistically, then model tu ok. Saya pon test-test, semua slopes and intercepts tak significantly different, mulalah excited, siap lompat-lompat.

Tiba-tiba pulak, committee member yang terer statistic kata, bukan macam tu. Kena test slope and intercept tu serentak guna F test. Saya pon susah hati, dah siap boleh bajet outcomenya, jadi selepas test ikut kata committee member, sah!! model tu significantly different!! Saya bertambah susah hati (Maknanya kena repeat modelling?? Tidak mahu!!!)

Bila cakap dengan SV, SV kata, saya tade masalah pon publish journal dengan cara saya test tu. Sudah, saya sudah pening, rasa mahu guling-guling. Kata Cody kawan saya, tulis saje value untuk dua-dua tests tu, suruh saje depa pilih mana yang depa mahu percaya. Statistic nie, banyak sangat 'trick'nya, kadang-kadang susah nak faham (ini bukan statisctic pasal mean, median). Kata Mark Twain (sape tak tahu Mark Twain sila google  ^_^);

"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics."

Siapa setuju, sila angkat tangan!! (Saya angkat tangan tinggi-tinggi sekali lagi) hehehe


The Crookedest Lane, San Francisco

Salam,

Saya decided nak update pictures p San Fran nie secara random saje. Sebenarnya, saya tak upload lagi gambar-gambar saya SD card saya, walaupun dah dekat 3 minggu balik trip. Kebetulan, camera adik saya rosak, SD card saya pulak dah penuh tahap maximum. Oleh kerana saya kena pos SD card nie kembali kepada tuannya, maka semalam tergopoh -gopoh copy. Saya tak kuasa nak edit bagai, jadi silalah tengok gambar original orang yang jenis hanya ketik-ketik camera hehehe. Saya tak larat juga nk buat caption, sebab kerja research menunggu-nunggu hehe
















Owh, FYI, saya berjaya naik ke atas, secara berlari hahahaha (sebab diberi masa 20 min saje kat spot nie) tapi lepas tu sesak nafas usahlah cakap hehehe.